Still Showing Up

I didn’t think I’d end up here.

Not after the years I’ve poured into learning to code—building real projects, leading teams, launching software that matters. Not after late nights debugging, long weekends refining, or the countless times I’ve stayed curious just for the love of it.

And yet, here I am.

Not broken, but stretched. Not done, but drained. Staring at a future that feels like it’s slipping further away, one unanswered job application at a time.

This season has tested me in ways I didn’t expect. I’ve spent years chasing the goal of meaningful work as a software engineer. Some days I feel close—like I can almost touch it. Other days, it’s like I’m treading water in the middle of the ocean, just hoping someone throws a rope.

I’ve applied to hundreds of roles. I’ve rewritten resumes, refined portfolios, practiced whiteboards, and tailored cover letters until they all started to blur together. I’ve followed up. I’ve shown up. And still—nothing has stuck.

Now, I’m looking at food service jobs to keep the lights on and support my family.

And quietly, there’s a voice in my head asking, “Will this hurt your chances? Will they see you as someone who just couldn’t make it in tech?”

Because let’s be honest: Tech loves potential—until it doesn’t.

Job postings say they want talent, but what they really want is the finished product. A self-starter with 10 years of experience, 15 side projects, and the ability to hit the ground running with zero ramp-up time.

But here’s what I’ve learned: Life doesn’t always give you the smooth path. Sometimes, doing what’s right—for your family, your health, your survival—means stepping sideways for a while. And that’s not failure. That’s responsibility.

So if taking a temporary job outside of tech is what it takes, I’ll do it. Not because I’m giving up, but because I’m still fighting for the long game.

There’s a stigma around stepping out of your industry, even briefly. But let me be clear: I haven’t stopped growing. I haven’t lost my edge. I’ve just had to sharpen it in different ways—through grit, through resilience, through humility.

I still build. I still code. I still care deeply about solving real problems for real people. That passion hasn’t dimmed. If anything, it’s burning more fiercely now.

And if you’re reading this—whether you’re in tech, or hiring for it—I ask this:

Don’t write off the ones who had to take a different path. The ones who are hungry. Who are still learning, still showing up, even when no one’s watching. Sometimes, what looks like desperation is actually determination. Sometimes, it’s the sign of someone who just won’t quit.

And maybe, just maybe, that’s exactly who you want on your team.